I Lost More Than A Friend

I am somewhere on the depression scale. January and February have always been dismal months for me. Often too cold to be outside and I have many projects to do outside. So I am anxious about not being able to do them. This puts me in a mood, without even taking into account social isolation and the political crap. It would be nice to have someone to have a beer with. I have had exactly 12 beers in 18 months. I’ll bet most of you are feeling about the same to one degree or another.

All these brought me to reflect on a dear friend I lost in November. We went back to our 20’s together. He loved music. He played a Les Paul, not all that well, but enough to amuse himself. We spent many nights together listening to music while smoking some weed. [His wife always carried a Mason jar of all buds in her purse]

Tom was losing kidney function and refused dialysis. If he could not have a transplant he was resigned to die. He refused contact with all of his many friends. Even his sister was mostly excluded. The last time he would take my calls or acknowledge an email was six months before he died.

Tom was always quick with a laugh and a solid friend. If he had an enemy, I never knew it.

I not only miss our sharing of music but our conversations. I miss Tom.

In the end, all we have are memories. I treasure them.



6 thoughts on “I Lost More Than A Friend”

  1. Sending you hugs, my friend. I am so sorry for your loss. It sounds like you lost a great friend and I am sure that is taking a toll on your heart. Thinking of you. XOXO, nora

  2. Sorry got the loss of your friend Tom. These gave indeed been troubled times for us all.
    Hard to beat this funk we’re all in.
    I list a good friend this past year along with my brother both to covid.
    We’ll eventually get through this, I hope.

  3. Sorry to hear of your loss. What a shame he refused contacts with his friends. I wonder why. You have good memories to treasure.


  4. I am sorry for your loss Bogey. It is hard to find the type of friend who a guy has a beer with. I can respect his decision to not have dalasi’s, my Dad made same decision on declining a feeding tube. I hope you are comforted in your memories and knowing he left the world on his own terms.

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