Several times in the life of this Blog, men have commented that they admire my good fortune in meeting a woman like Becall who enjoys spanking.
I agree I am lucky to have Becall, but not just for that reason. Besides, there are MANY women who want their bottoms paddled.
I did not declare to Becall my fascination with spanking until after we were married. Sure I gave her playful pops from time-to-time, but I was not honest with her before we said our vows. So if I am lucky, it is that she turned out to share my interest.
I suppose any rational person would agree that a spanking interest is something that should be discussed before marriage. I wonder how often it is done?
So you did not mention it before marriage and now her interest in spanking you does not match your interest in bending over. What can be done?
I am positive that more men could get spanked by their wives, if 1) they would go about it in a straight forward way. Write her a letter and let her know exactly what floats your boat. Keep in mind that women know more about role play than you ever will. While you were smashing your GI Joe’s with a hammer, she was playing house and her dolls were stand in’s for some very complex adult characters that sometimes needed a spanking.
2) Do something for her that she wants. I don’t mean furs and jewelry or even chocolates and flowers. You will have to think beyond tangible gifts. “What does she really want?” It could be she would like to spend more time with her Mother or have you cook a meal once in awhile. It will have to be something that you should have been giving her all along if you were not so selfish. Oh yeah, it can not be quid pro quo. This has to be something that you do and never ever mention, much less ask for something in return. You just do it with love.
After you have done this thing for a while, I would be surprised if she did not spank you more often. You did write that letter didn’t you?
Try it and see if you get to this situation.
Our Bottoms Burn 
Hi there. Great advice given as always. I was a spanko in my teens and my wife let me spank her when we were dating but she was never a real convert to have her bottom paddled. She was always good at spanking stories and role play so I have nothing to moan about. I decided to go submissive about 5 years ago. I hold down a difficult job and I reached the point where I just wanted to hand over the reins at home and become the one that was told what to do. It has been a fantastic experience.
I used the sincere letter method to let her know what I wanted and she took to it in a marvellously open way. Everything is so much easier now in our (long) marriage and I enjoy both the discipline and the chores and the realisation that I can no longer argue against her suggestions or wishes. The spanking is terrific and we combine a mixture of punishment routines and sex spanking. I wish that she had spotted this aspect of my psyche at the start of our marriage but better late than never.
It took a while for her to believe that I was being truthful and that I was prepared to change but we are both enjoying our marriage now and I am free to worship her and get the beatings I deserve.
If anyone out there(male or female submissive) is in doubt all I would say is try it. It works and this is not a story.
My wife is number three.It has lasted more than 40 years. I told her before we were married that I was a spanko but we didn't start with spanking in our sex life for various reasons, noise & kids mainly. When we had more alone time
later she had forgot about the spanko part of me. I remeinder that before we were married that she had said that she would spank me every day if it made me happy.
I had her sit on the bed facing me and told her to play with Mr. happy, as she did that, I started to spank myself with a paddle ball paddle
I only lasted a short time. (I was much younger then)She saw how much I was turned on and the sex after was so much better than we had been having. We were off to the spanko races after that.
She liked to receive too in the begining but now she only gives as her sex drive has greatly disinished.
Putt